We trust women.
Why do we think preparing for birth is so important? Why, as doulas, do we believe women often benefit from a doula even more in the hospital than they do at home? Why do we get so fired up about the language around birth, like being "allowed" to do something?
Because as a society, women are deeply mistrusted.
And we believe it is causing terrible outcomes for a large portion of mothers and babies. Yes, we do a pretty good job of keeping most people alive. But almost every birth story we hear (and we hear a lot of them because of what we do) contains some level of trauma that could have been avoided if that mother had been listened to and trusted.
Think about it for a second. Who is more invested in that baby than its mother?
And who, as a general rule, is one of the most dismissed, ignored, and undermined populations?
Women.
There is a lot of history behind this. We do not have time to unpack all of it here, but the reality is that we have built systems that do not trust women, women's bodies, and definitely not women's own lived experience and bodily knowledge.
And when society deeply mistrusts women, women start internalizing that mistrust.
Instead of knowing how to tune in and listen, many women second guess everything. They ignore body cues. They reach for advice from strangers on the internet. They take medical providers' words as gospel. And somewhere along the way, collaborative care gets replaced with hierarchy.
Instead of a woman being centered in her own care, she often gets pushed into a childlike role where she asks permission throughout pregnancy and birth.
"Am I allowed to eat?"
"Will they let me labor in the tub?"
"Can I decline that?"
And then that same self doubt follows her into motherhood. She questions every choice. She searches for someone to tell her what to do. She takes advice that does not align with her or her child because whether she realizes it or not, that self doubt has been woven deeply into our history, our cultural beliefs, and our medical and educational systems.
This is why we are so passionate about this work.
Because we trust women.
And when women are trusted, they begin learning how to trust themselves again. Maybe for the first time.
Imagine a world full of women who were deeply attuned to themselves and their babies. Women who made decisions from a place of knowing instead of asking what they were "allowed" to do as if they were children.
That is a huge part of why we created The Birth Alchemy Course.
Yes, we teach labor stages, comfort measures, interventions, and everything you would expect from childbirth education. But underneath all of that is a deeper thread woven through everything we teach.
We help families understand the system they are giving birth in, learn how to navigate it confidently, and remember how to come back to themselves in the process.
Because information matters. But we would argue that learning to trust yourself matters even more.
If this resonates, we invite you to check out our birth prep course. It might just have the missing piece you need that most courses ignore.
Always in your corner,
Kayla & Leslie
Responses